Disastrous love recipe
by Fearmyb0xers
Summary: Sanji and Zoro end up getting lost, thanks to Zoro, and separated from Brook. They find a small building, freezing, their legs tired from walking, they decide to take a rest.(Starts on Punk Hazard.)
1. Chapter 1

"We're lost and it is all your fault!" Sanji yelled, glaring at Zoro. "Nami-san's body is freezing and if she gets sick because you had to go the wrong way, I'm going to kick your ass." they had been looking for Brook for twenty minutes, thanks to the Yeti Cool Brothers, they had been separated when looking for the stupid Samurai.

Zoro's eye twitched, being yelled at by Sanji in Nami's body was pissing him off, since he couldn't hit Sanji. "Stop complaining you stupid cook." he looked around for somewhere they could take a small break, they had already been treading in the snow before the attack, and now being lost; he just wanted to sit for a moment. "Over there!" Zoro called out to Sanji, the blonde having been a few feet in front of him, pointing at a small round building. "We can sit and think about how to find Brook."

Sanji hated admitting that his legs, Nami's legs, were starting to get stiff from the walking, and her legs weren't as strong has his were. "Fine, but only for a short while, we need to find that Samurai and Brook, then return to the others." he took a final drag from the cigaret he'd been smoking, apologizing in his head to her.

Both men headed into the small building, it was obviously abandoned years ago, dust covered the floor, and there was an old fire circle in the middle of the room still with wood in it. Zoro shut the door behind him, looking around, there being no other furniture besides a bed and a stove. He glanced at Sanji, the blonde having lit the fire to warm the place up, and both sat down on opposite sides of it. The fire crackled, the small space of the round home making it warm up fairly quickly, still not warm enough for them to stop shivering completely.

"Ahh, why did that Samurai's power have to wear off if you remove an article of clothing." Sanji hung his head, looking at Nami's breast. "I can't even take a peek at them without risking the coat vanishing, then Nami-san would know what I've done, and worse, her body would get cold."

"You are a really big pervert aren't you..." Zoro stared at Sanji. "What am I saying...I already knew this..." he put his hands out toward the fire and let out a sigh, closing his good eye.

"I'm just a lover of the female frame, is there anything wrong with that?" Sanji moved his hands down, rubbing Nami's legs to make them feel better. "Though, Nami-san really needs to start walking more, she has such a great shape. But her leg muscles are still weak."

Zoro let out a small laugh and shook his head. "Lover of the female frame huh? Still sounds like you are a pervert to me."

Sanji stood up and glared at Zoro. "Want to say that again you shitty swordsman!" he moved toward Zoro, ready to punch him, the other man moving slightly to get up.

A very thin patch of ice on the floor, where at one point liquid had been split, caused Sanji to slip and fall on top of Zoro. Both Zoro and Sanji's eyes widened, in the past they'd had their close calls, always stopping a few inches before it happened, and this time wasn't one of them. Their lips were pressed against each other, well Nami's lips to Zoro's, and Zoro wasn't sure how his brain was supposed to react to the current situation. It wasn't Sanji's lips that were on his, it wasn't Sanji's body being pressed against his, and while he didn't find Nami unattractive, she wasn't his type. He hadn't even really thought about women, or anyone for that matter, in that way before, being more focused on becoming a swordsman, and the only girl he did like was dead.

In Sanji's mind many things were running inside his head, one was that he wasn't pulling away, another was that Zoro hadn't shoved him off him, though it was probably be cause he was a woman, and the thought that scared him the most was that he thought Zoro's lips felt nice. He'd been trying so hard to ignore what happened to him on the Okama Islands, that he'd gave into the side of him that he'd tried to keep hidden, that he'd allowed himself to dress like a woman and wear makeup, and liked the feeling of being free and not judged; though he still found the others on the island horrifying.

He'd tried to focus on women again, tried so hard to ignore that for two years on a island of crossdressers, all he could think about was Zoro, shirtless and training on the deck of the Thousand sunny. It didn't help him at all when he returned to find Zoro had gained more muscle, he also tried to stay off the deck when Zoro would be training, and tried to convince himself the only reason he was looking Zoro's way was that he was that he was finally around a strong normal man again.

Though it seemed as though they'd not moved for a long time, it had only been about a minute, and they both snapped out of their daze. Zoro shoving Nami's body off him to the side and sitting back up, looking at Sanji as he moved to a sitting position as well. Zoro had noticed it, even though it was only for a moment, Sanji had pressed Nami's body closer to his, had parted her lips and closed her eyes. It had caused Zoro to become aroused and confused at the same time, was he reacting to Nami's body or was he reacting to it being Sanji.

"What the hell was that!" Zoro watched Sanji stand up, Nami's cheek's were red, and Sanji placed her hand to her face. "...When we are done with all of this, when we get back on the Thousand Sunny, we are going to talk, when you are back in your own body."

Sanji groaned. "Can't we just forget it even happened?" he was ignored, Zoro putting the fire out, and both walked out of the building; back out into the snow and they could see the figure of their skeleton companion.

TBC


	2. Chapter 2

AN: I am still on Punk Hazard arc, so from this chapter on, events happening in the manga/anime after Smiley will be ignored.

Sanji breathed out, relieved to finally be back in his own body and back on the Thousand Sunny, he did wish that he'd tried to check out Nami's breast once more, the only time he'd been able to was when he first turned, if it wasn't out of fear of the warm clothes vanishing without the Samurai around to fix it, he would have.

Nami had been angry about the taste of cigarets in her mouth, she ended up hitting his head a few times, and went to wash her mouth out. Now, all he had to do was avoid Zoro till the idiot completely forgot about their little incident. Zoro was currently busy trying to pull Luffy back onto the ship with Franky, Luffy had spent the last hour trying to invite Trafalgar Law to join their crew, he also asked a couple of the surviving pirates that had been experimented on to join; thankfully, they all rejected Luffy.

Walking into the kitchen, Sanji's eye twitched, the kitchen was a mess, with half eaten food on the table that was going bad. "Those bastards..." he groaned, then quickly went to check his hidden pantry, he'd had the pantry made by Frankie to stop Luffy from eating all the food on his hungry days, by making the room smaller with a wall and a hidden sliding door. Pushing on the door, it popped out, and he slid it to the side. "Good, so if they did eat all the other food we at least won't starve till we get to the next island..." shutting the door, he went back to check the cabinets and fridge. There were only vegetables left, Ceazar's subordinates had eaten or stolen all the food they could find off the ship.

There were fish in the aquarium that they could eat, Frankie could also use a net to catch more if there weren't any. Sanji cleaned up the spoiling food, then got to work cleaning the rest of the kitchen. Luffy was laughing on deck, the ship starting to move away from the island now, and Sanji knew it was only a matter of time before the captain demanded food; so the cook grabbed some supplies from his secret pantry and started to make their meal.

Zoro had wanted to talk to Sanji once they were back on the ship, but the cook had went directly to the kitchen, and he took up the job of keeping Luffy out of the kitchen till Sanji was done cooking; the crew did it in shifts to make sure Luffy didn't disturb Sanji while he was cooking. Zoro was glad that they didn't get any more crew members from the island, the mens' quarters was already full, with seven men and only six beds. Though at least one of them was always awake and at the helm,walking around on deck or in the crows nest, most of the time Zoro and Luffy would sleep in other parts of the ship; crows nest, on deck, etc.

"Ahh! It really sucks Trafalguy didn't want to join us." Luffy pouted, folding his arms. "Oh well..." the captain sniffed the air and drooled. "Food!" he went to walk to the kitchen by Zoro got in his way. "Zoro! Sanji is making food, out of the way!" Luffy pushed at Zoro to get him to move. "I hope there is meat!"

"You have to wait idiot..." Zoro and the others knew that Sanji liked to cook in peace and while he had prepared meals with them all in the kitchen, there were times where he requested them to keep Luffy out, and with everything they just went through, Sanji needed alone time to relax. "When he is done cooking, he will come out to get us."

Luffy placed his hands on his stomach. "But Sanji usually already has something I can eat while waiting to eat!"

The door to the kitchen opened, Sanji smoking one of his cigarets. "He can come in, I am almost done. Those bastards who worked for that monster ate most of our supplies, we need to find a place to get more food soon." he took a drag, blowing the smoke into the air, and walked back to the stove.

Zoro shook his head, moving aside, and let Luffy run into the dinning area. With Luffy's lead, the rest of the crew sat down to wait for Sanji to finish cooking. Sanji smiled some, things were getting back to normal, the crew was all together, and they were back out to sea. Zoro glanced at Sanji's back while the blonde continued to cook, and leaned back in his chair.

Once the crew finished eating, everyone but Zoro and Robin quickly left, Robin often stayed to help Sanji with doing the dishes. When Robin collected all the plates, thanks to her Devil Fruit ability, and placed them in the sink, Zoro walked up beside her. "I'll help him..."

Robin was shocked by this, Zoro was normally one of the first to get out of there before he could be asked to help with anything, but smiled. "Alright, I will leave you two to it then." she walked out of the kitchen, glancing back to see Sanji standing awkwardly as far from Zoro as possible. 'Boys sure are silly, something must have happened, it is about time.' Robin laughed to herself and went to read one of her books.

The two men were silent, Zoro washing some of the dishes, and wondering why he didn't just wait for Robin to do them. "We need to talk." Zoro dried his hands off.

"Just drop it alright? It was an accident, we don't need to discuss it..." Sanji turned to look at him. "If you aren't going to finish helping with the dishes, you should leave, go train or something. Being around you just pisses me off."

Zoro grabbed Sanji's arm roughly, looking him in the eye. "You piss me off too, you and your stupid eyebrows." Zoro pulled him closer, Sanji's eyes widening. "What happened left me confused, I won't be satisfied until we sort this out."

"Oh? And how do you expect to do that? Lawn head-" Sanji was cut off by Zoro kissing him on the lips, Sanji's body going completely stiff. Zoro's lips weren't soft, they were a little chapped from not being cared for well, as well as from the cold weather conditions they'd been in.

Zoro was about to pull back, when Sanji's hands reached up, moving into his hair, and gripping his head tightly. It sent Zoro over the edge, causing him to push Sanji up against the counter, his hands going to Sanji's hips. One of Sanji's legs wrapped around Zoro and he started to kiss the other man back, his lips parting to let Zoro's tongue in. They were both twenty-one years old, Sanji wasn't a virgin and it had been years since he'd had sex or made out with a girl, and for Zoro, he just didn't care about anything but becoming the best swordsman; so both had pent up sexual frustration.

Sanji rubbed his tongue against Zoro's, getting lost in the moment, feeling the other man suck on his tongue causing him to let out a moan, and that snapped him out of it. Quickly, he broke the kiss, breathing hard, and looking into Zoro's good eye. "Damn you, shitty swordsman..."

With a smirk, Zoro moved a hand between Sanji's legs, feeling the other man's erection. "Looks like you enjoyed it."

"Ah! What are you doing idiot!" Sanji gasped, feeling Zoro rub him through his pants. "You want to play that game huh?" he moved his own hand from Zoro's head, reaching into the front of Zoro's pants, and ran his finger tips along his pubic hair, inches away from his penis.

Zoro jerked his hips forward, becoming more aroused. "Mmn, crazy chef..." he kissed Sanji's neck and started to protest when Sanji removed his hand, shoving him away.

The blonde man, slid off the counter and ran a hand through his own hair. "We can't do this in the kitchen, its unsanitary."

"Fine, then we won't do this in the kitchen..." Zoro grabbed a hold of Sanji's arm, pulling him out of the kitchen.

"Where are we going!" Sanji tried to pull his arm away from Zoro, the other man pulling him along with him. They walked into the library, toward the ladder, no one had seen them as they were all busy, Ussop and Frankie were working on ship improvements, Nami was making a map of Punk Hazard in the girls quarters, Chopper was entertaining Luffy, and Robin was relaxing on deck with her book. "You perverted bastard..." Sanji said low, once he realized where they were heading.

"Shut up...you aren't exactly pulling away and leaving." Zoro released him, climbing up the ladder to the bath house.

Sanji looked behind him to the door of the library, then back to the ladder, Zoro already to the top. "...Damn transvestites really fucked me up..." he climbed up the ladder.

"Did you say something?" Zoro was in the bath house, already down to his underwear.

"...Yea, I said don't get use to getting your way, you Mosshead. This is also a one time deal, we're both worked up, got that! Don't even think about this happening again..." Sanji swallowed, looking over Zoro's muscled and scared body.

Zoro rolled his eye, turning on the water, and removing his underwear.

TBC


End file.
